It was hard to get up again this morning. But I did remember a bit more of a dream than I have been recalling lately. That was nice. It was pouring rain, so I decided to skip the walk. I have walked in the pouring rain, but I didn’t today.
I had a lot of big feelings today. Cried quite a bit. But right after work, a thunderstorm rolled in. There were rumbles of thunder, but I didn’t see any lightning. The air felt charged when I opened the door to get some video. And then it got really windy, and the clouds blew away. And I felt more cheerful and optimistic.
I got my taxes done and filed, but not the response letter from that error Ambrose made. The IRS site won’t let me sign on; I should have set up the account a month ago, but I’m giving myself grace because the whole situation upsets me. Here’s hoping there won’t be a penalty for the response letter being a little late. I mean, I did already pay them.
By the time I got to the hot springs, the wind was still blowing strong, but the sun was starting to come out. There were beautiful cloud formations in every direction. I had to let my hands warm in the hot tub before I started reading. I was a little social, but not much. I mostly read.
I thought about pitching a tent in my yard. It’s probably still a bit too cold at night for that. But I want to sleep outside. Maybe with warmer weather over this weekend I’ll be able to open my bedroom windows at night. Now that I’ve jammed some screens onto them.
I didn’t expect the anniversary of the celebration of life would impact me the way that it has. I’m thinking about him a lot as I see the pictures from last year’s trip to South Carolina pop up on my phone. I will try to embrace this. Missing him.
